The Job Interview, part 5

AUGUST 21, 2015

11:11 AM

CODY

Good morning

11.26

I have a question.

ME, 12.39

Yes?

CODY, 12.45

Do you know how to crack a safe?

ME

Er…

CODY

It’s an emergency.

ME

I’ve never tried to??? but I saw a couple episodes of Burn Notice?

1.06 PM

What I gathered was mostly that it depends what kind of safe it is and where it’s located. Some you can jam the lock in and force it to open and some you have to listen for the clicks.

CODY, 11.40 PM

It’s a sentry

It’s a key pad

ME

Hm. Water saw?

CODY

Message Kaylee she’s trying to bust it she don’t have no water saws

Saddly

ME

Okay, gotta finish archiving first though.

CODY

Ok

So I messaged Makayla on Facebook and this was the conversation:

Sigyn Wisch

Also, ytf are you trying to crack a safe?

Makayla Marie

Money

Help

2:00pm

Sigyn Wisch

any reason you can't just, like, ask someone for the code?

Makayla Marie

About that

I cany

Don't ask don't tell

Sigyn Wisch

O...kay, but this is illegal and the government watches Facebook messages.

Makayla Marie

It's not

My friend lost the code

Sigyn Wisch

Maybe it's their anniversary

or their mum's birthday

I don't know, d'you have a sledgehammer?

Makayla Marie

No I do not

Sigyn Wisch

http://get.smarter.com/web?am=broad&q=how+do+i+open+a+sentry+safe&an=google_s&askid=0eaaf898-1646-4aff-b831-f71df7a9ac89-0-sm_gsb&kv=default&gc=0&dqi=&qsrc=999&ad=semD&o=32247&l=&af=

Makayla Marie

Idk which one to click

Sigyn Wisch

Dunno, try em all and see which one works for you

Makayla Marie

I'm scared

Sigyn Wisch

Oh

Makayla Marie

I'm running out of time

Sigyn Wisch

What exactly is the problem?

Makayla Marie

The loan shark has my  other dog i have to get him money

Sigyn Wisch

Well, maybe just don't go to loan sharks anymore???? why were you messing with them in the first place?

Makayla Marie

I had no choice

I need 2k fast

Sigyn Wisch

There's always another choice besides dealing with people who steal dogs.

and kill them.

Makayla Marie

I had no other option at that moment

What can I do

Sigyn Wisch

Of course you did.

Pray.

Makayla Marie

I start my benefits next month

What am I gonna do he won't wait

Sigyn Wisch

*shrug* Well,you should have thought about that before you went to a loan shark

Everyone knows they're bad news

Makayla Marie

I didn't jnow

Sigyn Wisch

Remember when you asked me about loans and I said I don't mess with that stuff? Every single time? This is why

Just sell your makeup on eBay or Craigslist or something.

Makayla Marie

Iv tried

Sigyn Wisch

Then sell your body. You can make two thousand in two nights. Maybe three.

Makayla Marie

Iv tried

Excuse me? Ain't no way you actually did try selling your makeup or your body. I knew that suggestion was outrageous when I gave it.

My hypothesis is that she doesn't actually need the money for a loan shark; she needs it for her wedding. She got back together with the guy she was with when we met and they're engaged. In a previous conversation, which I didn't post on this blog, she indicated that he wants-- she said "needs"-- to get married quickly.

2.22PM

I have a question

And a deal

2.25 PM

Hello

ME, 2.30 PM

Hi sorry Loki’s hungry talk and I’ll get back to you when he’s fed

CODY

Sigyn

2.47 PM

Ok let me know

3.25 PM

Can I tell you now

ME, 3.30 PM

Okay. You can really tell me anything anytime, I just might not respond right away :)

CODY

Well me. And my wife have a deal

ME

Let’s hear it :)

CODY

We are letting you know this but don’t tell the others ok

We have a house on one side of the property we never let workers live there but Kaylee said good thing about you. And she went to bat for you so with this deal I ask one thing. I’ll explain why

ME, 3.45

What’s the deal?

CODY

We are going to trust kaylees word. We will let you and your husband have the house to yourself. We will still pay as planed and you mention you didn’t want to stay forever. If you guys last a year you will get the yearly pay increase. And we will buy you a vehicle. Or if you like one of the trucks you can have it. We will help you get re established when you want to move on. But we don’t care how you do it get 2k I asked my wife if we can pay kaylees debt she said no because she don’t work for us. We just got our cattle check. So we have everything in the green now. You still have jobs and I expect the best. Kaylee put her reputation on the line and said amazing things about you. I believe her. And for my wife to be willing to let someone into our guest house says a lot her father built it

ME, 4.00 PM

I’m confused. We’re broke. Kaylee put us up for this job because I told her about our situation, which is basically Loki crashing at the library every night and me at my dad’s because I thought I was getting into a tech program before I talked to her. I put in a group message that we are broke and have nowhere to stay together and that’s how she told us about your offer. Why would you or she think we had any money when we’re in that circumstance? I mean, if that was the case, I wouldn’t be asking for a job.

CODY

I know you need a job and I’m giving you one. I will pay you not only what you get her but extra. I am willing to give you a job to make 50k a year minimum. Free room and board and vehicles to use and gas money

This is the best job you can get in Central.

ME

That’s great and we’re grateful, but our only source of income would be from you. We do not have money or anything of value. The best I can offer is, cut my pay in half and give half to Kaylee until her debt is paid.

CODY

That’s not an option. I was in your place believe me I know the streets you can always make something work

She put her neck on the line 3 house members voted against you until Kaylee stepped in

She’s why you have the job

LOKI

There is literally nothing we can do. Our phone is getting shut off next month because we can’t afford the $30 phone bill. If you really think that getting that money is a possibility, then it is her possibility and her responsibility We told her not to get a loan. We told her loan sharks are bad news.

ME

There is nothing we can do until we get paid and we made that pretty clear from the start. Sorry if that means this won’t work out.

CODY

Well when I pick you guys up you talk to my wife. She’s not going to be happy.

I need work and I’m on the line so you two get to thinking. I’ll put you under my plan. It will be $10 each for each of you to have smartphones

So don’t worry about your phone

(At this point, I didn’t figure there was much else that needed saying, so I just went to Makayla and asked her about what was going on. She kept telling me “talk to Cody, talk to Cody, Cody will get butthurt if you don’t talk to him, talk to Cody” and here I thought it wasn’t part of any job application to babysit a potential employer… Then she told me he said he was taking the job off the table if I didn’t respond. sO mAtUrE~)

Here's the transcript of my conversation with Makayla:

4:16pm

Sigyn Wisch

Call me, we need to talk

Makayla Marie

 I'm on 2g

What's up

Sigyn Wisch

Looks like we got the job, but they want us to pay your debt. As you know, we don't have a single earthly dollar between us or we wouldn't need a job. I offered to give you half my pay but Cody said it wouldn't work.

Makayla Marie

 I don't know what's up his ass I am on my way to the ranch as we speak

Talk to him then fill me in ill handle him

Did he say why he wants you to do that

Sigyn Wisch

Because Sarah said he can't pay your debt since you don't work for them. I told him just cut my  pay and give half to Kaylee and he said it wouldn't work

Thank you for getting us the job, by the way. I mean it. I just, I thought he knew we didn't have any money

If we did, you wouldn't be in this situation.

Makayla Marie

 I know just talk to him if you don't respond he gets ass hurt

Sigyn Wisch

I told him all of that

Look, I'm sorry, but it is not our responsibility to 1) take care of other people's debts, especially when they go against our advice and 2) prevent grown adults from getting, er, "ass hurt".

Also, he should know that we don't have money

For example, this message, sent on the 29th of July at 3:28 PM:

I told her if we got this job, I’d set aside part of my earnings to help her with whatever she needs, but other than that, you know, I don’t really know what to do other than be there for her.

Kind of implies that we have nothing

Makayla Marie

I don't want your help I am doing Shit on my own

Just don't adjatate him

I'm half way there

Talk to him be calm

Sigyn Wisch

I talked to him. I said my piece

As far as I'm concerned, there's really nothing else to say.

Either he wants us to work for him or he doesn't.

Makayla Marie

Well talk work get all details

Sigyn Wisch

I've got nothing to say or ask right now

Makayla Marie

"If they don't reply in 5 mins the job is gone I refuse to waste my time"

He just sent that

He needs info to put in file

Sigyn Wisch

Then he can ask me anything. I warned him straight up front that I can't always reply immediately. I've got archiving to do

Makayla Marie

Archiving?

Sigyn Wisch

That's right

5:06pm

Makayla Marie

What's that

Sigyn Wisch

Transferring information from a short-term, low-memory storage device to a long-term, high-memory storage device

Makayla Marie

Ah

Sigyn Wisch

Yep. It's important to store information accurately and securely.

Makayla Marie

Cool

Sigyn Wisch

So, it seems like either Cody's busy or he don't want to talk anymore

Makayla Marie

Hes mucking

Sigyn Wisch

Okay

Makayla Marie

Yep

And now, back to my conversation with Cody:

ME, 4.46

Okay

CODY

Good you responded

ME

Well, yes. I’m archiving while we’re talking, so responses may be slow, but I am reading your messages.

CODY

Good I talked to Kaylee

ME

OK

5.02

…? Anything of interest?

CODY

Yes

ME

Alright. What’s up?

CODY, 5.17

Your smart I’m not

ME

Wait, what?

CODY, 6.21 PM

You just need to post links everywhere.

ME

What do you mean?

CODY, 8.06 PM

I don’t care how you do it get views and clicks on her videos and the deal remains. She’s working tonight.

ME

Got it

CODY, 8.22 PM

Her ads need clicks too.

ME

Yep

CODY

Mobile views don’t count

ME

No problem

CODY, 9.18 PM

She needs major views comments likes shares

Basically anything that tips off Adsense

ME

Yep, she’ll get it, no worries :)

CODY

You know how AdSense works yes

ME

Not really

CODY

Well google it. We need to tip the scales of it so she gets cash flow going in

ME

Mm. She’ll get plenty of views the next few days

CODY

Good do you use Adsense

ME

No

CODY

You should

ME

*shrug*

CODY

Well can you look into it

ME

Ok

CODY

Thank you my wife wants to start using it

ME

Well, if y’all think it’s a good system, she probably should :)

CODY

We don’t know how it works

ME

Then perhaps you should look into it :)

CODY

I have and I don’t understand it

(and then I casually sent a screenshot of the first Google result, which reads:

“AdSense is a program that allows bloggers and website owners to make money by displaying Google ads. You’ve probably seen the ads all over the place, including in Google search results. Basically, Google gets the largest cut and you get a small percentage.)

AUGUST 22, 2015

6.39 PM

CODY

Hello.

(No other messages than that. So…did he just want to chat??? This is quite a bizarre application process… *whistles*)

AUGUST 23, 2015

2.24 PM

ME

Good afternoon and good news! We did some research and it turns out Kaylee doesn’t actually owe any money :)

(No response yet, but I will keep you all posted!)