"You're too young and pretty to be in this situation!"

I get that a lot. I understand that it's well-meaning, but it's also misguided, and here's why.

I'm 24 years old. That's young for an inhabitant of the Earth, yes, and even young for a human, but it's by no means "too young" to have experienced hardship. As for looks, they honestly have nothing to do with anything. This is what I look like:

As you can see, it's date-stamped. I took it just before writing this entry. (By the way, I love this dress. You can't see all the colours because of my webcam quality, but it's got some good ones.) Opinions on my looks have run the gamut from "not bad, but not my type" to "stunningly gorgeous goddess". Your Mileage May Vary, but the general consensus is that I'm good-looking, and I tend to agree. However, that has nothing to do with whether or not I, as a person, experience hardship. Please note that the following examples are given to make a point and I am not asking for pity or sympathy or anything like that.

I was younger and still pretty when I made the choice between going to a shitty trade school or ending my life.

Me at age 22, just before entering trade school

I was younger and still pretty when someone I thought was my friend turned out to be a catfisher who used multiple sock puppets to manipulate me and steal the novel series I'd been working on for all my life-- then denied it and turned my fiance against me.

Me, at age 17, when I was in constant contact with said sock.

I was younger and still pretty when I developed extreme depression and anxiety because of various things going on in my life. The most egregious of these were the failure of a relationship that meant a lot to me, the subsequent entrance into a relationship with someone who toyed with me because I was naive, a very transient and unstable home life, and to put it in its most basic form, I couldn't do anything right for anyone even when I tried. I was young and pretty when I turned to self-medicating with sex and alcohol to take the pain away.

Me, at age 15, when I first developed addictions to sex and alcohol

I was younger and still pretty when my dad lost our home. We went from shelter to shelter in San Jose and, while we were lucky enough to get into Section 8 housing, that wasn't a viable option for me as a single adult.

Me at age 12, just before we became homeless.

I was younger and still pretty when I got taken by the State over a misunderstanding because they were on a witch hunt for my father. He wasn't a perfect parent by any means, but the main thing they had against him was simply the fact that he was a single father raising a girl. Gross, right?
(That was sarcasm, by the way. If you actually believe that, please get the fuck off my blog.)

Me, at age 10, when I was a ward of the State.

I was even younger when my dad's job got outsourced and we had to move to a different country, then from our new state to a different state, and he had to switch careers just to help our family get by.

Me at age 3, when we first got settled; you can tell because it says "San Jose" at the bottom of the pic.

The picture on my certificate of citizenship.

So, humble readers, while I know you mean well when you tell someone sympathetically that they're "too young and pretty" to be in X-situation, please keep in mind that youth and beauty do not exempt one from hardships in their life. Thank you.