November 28, 2021 | convo with Bex

Snipped audio here:

 SIGYN, 10:40 a.m.

Heads up: I'll be spamming the TV Time chat with out of context Lucifer commentary. Hope you're holding up ok 🤗

(12:19 p.m.) [snip baby video]

(4:39 p.m.) bruh

That baby is ROWDY this evening

 

You missed a video chat with Rebecca. – 4:41 p.m.

 

BEX, 4:46 p.m.

SIGYN, 5:46 p.m.

[snip voice messages]

(6:22 p.m.) I love her

 

BEX

That's cute. 🥰

 

SIGYN

She has such wholesome energy in those scenes

That's actually primarily what reminded me of Freya and then I thought she looks a bit like her too

she has the sweetest energy in those scenes. I'll splice them all together for you but it'll take a few days lol

 

E/N: Snipping all the BHE flashback videos, except ones with additional commentary, from this chat because I’ve already made a comprehensive one.

 

BEX, 6:51 p.m.

Sorry hun. Not having Goodluck with Rhett. So replies slow for a bit. Lol

 

SIGYN

it's fine! I'm just sending clips of what I'm watching. I know bebby is beastling

(7:20 p.m.) I feel bad that I think the little boy in the show is kinda ugly XD

(7:50 p.m.)

(8:00 p.m.) just Eve Hewson being precious and the cuteness of her character's friendship with Rob

(8:13 p.m.) I love those dresses and their castle

November 27, 2021 | convo at Bex

 SIGYN, 12:06 p.m.

mornfternoon! :D how's the housecleaning going? I woke up with a cleaning bug too. And then had to sweep up some dead bugs from under the sink

(6:13 p.m.)

i named one of the collections after you >:D 

November 26, 2021 | convo with Bex

 SIGYN, 12:08 p.m.

Short answer is I panicked. I felt both isolated and trapped (therapist flaked on me, it was a holiday so no one else at the agency was available) and wanted to take myself away from the pain and anxiety. It happens every so often, used to be every couple of weeks but now it's been about a year. I'm still alive, which I guess is okay

I'm sorry. I know I said I wouldn't, or something like that. I just flipped out.

 

BEX

*hugs extra tight* hun...you had me worried sick! I'm just glad you're ok! I'm sorry I wasn't around, but please don't do that again or anything that will hurt you. I love you! ❤❤❤

 

SIGYN

I'm so sorry, again. It wasn't because you specifically weren't there; you're important to me & our stories are the highlight of our day, but what happened was, Loki said that fucked up shit I told you about. Then I scheduled an emergency appointment with my therapist. She flaked. I took some sleeping pills and crashed. The next day I was supposed to be at my dad's for Thanksgiving but Loki didn't want to take me because I was "bitchy" (hung over from sleeping pills & anxious to get to my dad's). My dad wasn't picking up the phone. I flipped out and cut myself. Loki basically said I was just misbehaving because I didn't get my way

 

BEX

What a horrible person he is! Honestly hun, you got to get away from him.

 

SIGYN

My sister says I've got to find a caretaker for Lucius and me so we can kick him out

(2:21 p.m.) I don't know where to find one though and I'm freaking out

I don't like thinking about sex outside of, like, our discussions and

Anyway he comes into my room and runs his hands over my body (NO) and when I say no he asks why and then he mentions things that are sex adjacent and I panic and then he uses THAT as an excuse to say cuddling is a waste of time and we shouldn't be together

(2:45 p.m.) I don't care if we're together but I want my baby with me and I don't know where to find a caretaker

Sorry. I'm just freaking out. Anyway, I finally got a lock on my door

When you have a moment though, it's your turn on everything I'm pretty sure

(4:42 p.m.)

Rebecca missed your video chat. – 4:42 p.m.

 

SIGYN, 5:51 p.m.

I had a candied apple and I ate the candy part and gave him the apple part. He likes it

(6:57 p.m.) other than me having an episode, I hope you had a wonderful thanksgiving ❤️ I was able to make it to my dad's, not able to help with preparation but we did get to eat, and we found out Lucius likes stuffing. I know you've probably got some eventful things going on, so just wanted to let you know I'm going to try to get round to editing and uploading our fic :D I'll send you things that make me think of you as per usual but don't be alarmed about not responding or anything like that, esp if you're having fun with the family 💖 Thank you for being there for me all these years & I love you very much! Cheers!

November 25, 2021 | short convo with Bex

 SIGYN, 11:42 a.m.

so I tried to ☠ myself and Loki is acting like I'm just misbehaving. Later I asked if he still loves me and he says we talk about it later

 

BEX, 12:16 p.m.

You did what now! Why would you do that? Are you ok?

November 24, 2021 | convo at Bex

 SIGYN, 9:03 a.m.

[snip baby video]

(9:37 a.m.) Good morning!

Loki is being a lazybones so I get to hang out with Lucius and actually get this house clean

(9:53 a.m.)

(12:20 p.m.) [snip baby video]

(12:37 p.m.)

that's Vae Victus and she's a good kitty

(1:12 p.m.)

Trent: No, the way he said it is valid.

(2:07 p.m.) My stupid therapist cancelled on me and no one wants to talk to me I'm fucking going back to bed I hate my fucking life

November 23, 2021 | snippets of convo with Bex

 (just stuff I didn't want to put in Sassy RP Archive)

SIGYN, 4:44 p.m.

I'm mad at Loki because Lucius is having a fit and Loki said that's why he needs a nap at 3 every day. But 3 is when Loki came to pick us up and Loki said he didn't think Lucius would take a nap anyway

 

BEX

men are so weird. You can't disrupt a baby/toddlers schedule and he should know that.

SIGYN

Honestly it's pretty fucked up. He came and got us early, claims he didn't feel like having it over his head that he was going to be driving later, then got upset with me for not giving him a nap at 3 when that was the time he arrived to come get us. I told him that's the time he arrived to come get us and he said "well I didn't think he'd go down for a nap anyway". Lucius was having fun playing with his blocks and everything. On the way home Loki said he (Loki) wanted to take a nap but he wasn't going to, and I told him he should just plug in my TV and go rest. Loki declined. Then when we got home acted like he was dismissing me and saying "you're free to go" when I had no intention of going

Now Lucius is strapped into his napnap chair anyway because Loki got "tired of him" crying, when the reason he is crying is because Loki is acting like Lucius is getting in the way of him playing video games and listening to videos on his phone. He's not cuddling the baby, so the baby is upset, so his solution is to strap the baby into his chair.

Oh he's acting like IM the reason Lucius didn't get a nap though

I try to comfort poor confused little Lucius and Loki goes "stop buying into it and just go"

BEX

Ummm! No! Loki messed up Lucius's schedule. That is his fault Lucius is upset and you do not just ignore a baby when they are crying with a certain tone. He needs to unplug and pay more attention to his son. Just my two cents.

 

SIGYN

💯💯💯💯

Agreed

Loki's being a little bitch. He's claiming he's unhappy but not doing anything about it. He's claiming he wants a nap but not go taking one

He's shooing me out of the room when I want to spend time with my son

 

BEX

I mean, I know I am on here a LOT, but I try to pay attention to Rhett when he tries to get my attention. I'm NOT perfect by any means, and when Steve calls me on being on to long, that is when I go silent...just fyi. ♥ ♥ ♥

 

SIGYN

Oh no I mean, I'm always happy to VC with Rhett so he gets some attention too from Lucius and me, but yeah If you have to go "afk baby" I totally understand

 

BEX

Your son, you decide. Is exactly what I told steve when we got into a dispute at one point. I carried him for 8 months, I gave birth to him, I decide.

 

SIGYN

Half the time when I try to VC you it's so Lucius can chat

ooh okay. My dad says I need to put my foot down more too

 

5:00 p.m.

 

BEX

I think you do too but I understand not really 'wanting' too cause you live with him and don't want to cause 'drama'. even more so when he is the way he is.

 

SIGYN

Maybe I sleep in their room tonight and wake up with the baby

At this stage I think I'm a better parent. I know my Lucius. He wants love and attention and he's entitled to it. Loki treating him like he "has" to take care of him rather than is a joy to take care of him is fucked up

 

BEX

I totally 100% agree with you.

SIGYN

(5:19 p.m.) My dad was checking in to see if Lucius is okay

He offered to come pick us up but I don't think Lucius could get to sleep in his crib there

(6:57 p.m.) (after Loki said some inappropriate things that are detailed in the RP log)

Eh, he's trying to guilt me or panic me into fucking him so he doesn't leave

 

BEX

I am SOOOOOO disappointed in him right now.

No...disappointed isn't even the word

I can't....I just...UGH! He makes me want to throw something....

are YOU ok? *hugs*

 

SIGYN

Agreed, but I'm not displaying emotion right now because I don't want him using it against me to try to claim I'm an unfit mother

 

BEX

I mean, how are you handling this?

 

SIGYN

I'm upset but I can't react where he can see it.

 

BEX

why would he do that when it's clear, from what we talked about eariler that he doesn't have any interest in his son?

 

SIGYN

To punish me.

 

BEX

every time we talk...he is playing a game or on the computer....I can say so if it comes down to it.

 

SIGYN

He says he does that because he's dealing with the baby all day

 

BEX

NO he isn't!!

 

SIGYN

"dealing with the baby"

not raising our son.